Ross: I went to the tanning place your wife suggested.
Chandler: Was that place the sun?
Remember when I said I was a master of Mystic Tan? Several of you wanted to know more, so here are a few tips for the palefaces.
1. Shower, shave and exfoliate.
2. Do not moisturize. (Use lotion only on extremely dry knees and elbows.)
3. Wear loose clothing.
4. Once inside the machine, stand with your arms out like the girl pictured below. Remember to separate your fingers though. (Think, jazz hands!)
5. Tilt your head back at a slight angle so you get an even tan on your face and neck.
6. When it's time to turn around, hold your arms out the same way as before, but keep your hands in front of your body this time. (This prevents a double spray on your hands.)
7. When you get out, immediately wipe off your hands and feet. Your hands and feet will still hold some color. Wiping them off will prevent them from being too dark.
8. Lightly dab the rest of your body with a towel. Dabbing, not wiping, will prevent streaks and an uneven tan.
9. You'll want to avoid sweating and showering for the next 6 to 8 hours. (Personally, I spray tan at night. I wait until the next morning to shower.)
10. After your first shower, you can moisturize like normal.
*For me, a Mystic Tan typically lasts 7 days.
**If I'm trying to get tan for a special event, I will spray a second time 72 hours later.
***Chlorine and salt water will cause the tan to fade faster.
****Mystic Tan isn't right for everyone, but you won't know until you try.
*****Getting a great Mystic Tan takes time. If you don't get it right the first time, try again.
I hope these tips help you achieve the perfect Mystic Tan. If you end up looking like Lindsay Lohan, it's because you can't follow instructions. Don't blame me.