February 02, 2011
Man Week -- Ed
Today's featured dude is Ed. If you're not following his blog, you should be because he brings the jokes. He says things that you shouldn't laugh at, but totally do.
Disclaimer: Remember, these are men we're talking about so there will be inappropriate language. It's just how they roll. You'll see my thoughts below in pink.
Superhero Name: Mr. Fantabulous (MF'er for short)
Blog: Ed's Funny Pages
1. Since your wife can't read your mind, what would you like for Valentine's Day other than sex?
You ask that like there IS something else.
2. What's one simple thing you wish every woman understood?
Men just want a little peace and quiet. Give us a piece and then be quiet.
3. All guys name their penis. Go ahead and tell us what you call yours.
Only my wife knows, and she's not telling.
4. You're allowed to cheat with 5 celebs. Who are they?
Wait! Are you saying 5 AT ONE TIME? Who has THAT kind of stamina? And what celebs would be that selfless and sharing?
With all that said, probably Katy Perry...Halle Berry...Zooey Deschanel...Stana Katic...Janet Montgomery. No wait, Natalie Portman. No wait, Mila Kunis. No, Amy Adams. And Sofia Vergara. But not in that order. And it's not set in stone so it changes constantly. In my mind.
Ed's got good taste, don't you think?
5. Describe yourself using only 3 words.
I refuse to contain my awesomeness to 3 words. It's like asking the Pope to say Mass in 3 words. But three commonly used adjectives are funny, smart and ass.
6. Name one chick flick you actually enjoyed.
Last one we watched was You've Got Mail on tv. Meg Ryan's a cutie. My favorite was probably The Notebook. I cried like a baby. And Rachel McAdams is HAWT! Oh wow, go back and add her to my celeb list.
The Hero cried like a baby at The Notebook too.
7. Batman, Superman or Spider-Man? Why?
Superman. Duh. Batman's not really a superhero. Who says? Spiderman is emotionally compromised and limited in his abilities. Superman can fly, blow and freeze stuff with super breath, is super fast, can shoot lasers from his eyes, and his only weekness is limited to a rare element.
8. They're making a movie about your teen years. What's it called?
The Most Awesomest Movie Ever Made Part 2... because sequels are better.
9. You're on Death Row. What will you order for your last meal?
Probably depends on the mode of execution, but I would say it would have to be extremely rare and hard to find. It would also be lasting and filling AND not too messy when it exits on the gurney/chair.
10. Tell us a joke.
What am I doing here? Handouts? You want jokes, come read my blog or see my standup. Geez.