February 02, 2011

Man Week -- Ed

Today's featured dude is Ed. If you're not following his blog, you should be because he brings the jokes. He says things that you shouldn't laugh at, but totally do.

Disclaimer: Remember, these are men we're talking about so there will be inappropriate language. It's just how they roll. You'll see my thoughts below in pink.

Name: Ed
Age: 30-something
Location: Indiana
Superhero Name: Mr. Fantabulous (MF'er for short)
Blog: Ed's Funny Pages

1. Since your wife can't read your mind, what would you like for Valentine's Day other than sex?
You ask that like there IS something else.

2. What's one simple thing you wish every woman understood?
Men just want a little peace and quiet. Give us a piece and then be quiet.

3. All guys name their penis. Go ahead and tell us what you call yours.
Only my wife knows, and she's not telling.
No fun!

4. You're allowed to cheat with 5 celebs. Who are they?
Wait! Are you saying 5 AT ONE TIME? Who has THAT kind of stamina? And what celebs would be that selfless and sharing?

With all that said, probably Katy Perry...Halle Berry...Zooey Deschanel...Stana Katic...Janet Montgomery. No wait, Natalie Portman. No wait, Mila Kunis. No, Amy Adams. And Sofia Vergara. But not in that order. And it's not set in stone so it changes constantly. In my mind.

Ed's got good taste, don't you think?

5. Describe yourself using only 3 words.
I refuse to contain my awesomeness to 3 words. It's like asking the Pope to say Mass in 3 words. But three commonly used adjectives are funny, smart and ass.

6. Name one chick flick you actually enjoyed.
Last one we watched was You've Got Mail on tv. Meg Ryan's a cutie. My favorite was probably The Notebook. I cried like a baby. And Rachel McAdams is HAWT! Oh wow, go back and add her to my celeb list.
The Hero cried like a baby at The Notebook too.

7. Batman, Superman or Spider-Man? Why?
Superman. Duh. Batman's not really a superhero. Who says? Spiderman is emotionally compromised and limited in his abilities. Superman can fly, blow and freeze stuff with super breath, is super fast, can shoot lasers from his eyes, and his only weekness is limited to a rare element.

8. They're making a movie about your teen years. What's it called?
The Most Awesomest Movie Ever Made Part 2... because sequels are better.

9. You're on Death Row. What will you order for your last meal?
Probably depends on the mode of execution, but I would say it would have to be extremely rare and hard to find. It would also be lasting and filling AND not too messy when it exits on the gurney/chair.

10. Tell us a joke.
What am I doing here? Handouts? You want jokes, come read my blog or see my standup. Geez.


Ian said...

Nice work. Fuck Batman. The end.

Ed said...

Hey look! That's ME!

Allena said...

I hope his wife is a brunette for all the celebs he chose! As I brunette, I am very happy with the choices. :)

Impulsive Addict said...

I'm off to check out these two funny guys!

Good idea to feature them. There aren't many MANLY bloggers out there.

jennykate77 said...

Funny man.

I think he's yellow for not wanting to share the name of his penis. What kind of man is he?

FOR REAL?! Is someone gonna step up and pick Batman. He is THE superhero. Plus, he wears black and that is just damn sexy.

Ed said...

Allena: She is! :)

Most guys have a weakness for Blondes and Big boobs.

My weakness is Brunettes & nice buns.

Ed said...

Jennykate77: That was the missus call. She's a little protective.

(I've always just referred to him as "Big Ed")

Jay Ferris said...

I feel sorry for whoever the poor bastard is that's going to have to try and follow Ed.

Anonymous said...

I'm loving these features! I haven't heard of Ed. I'm happy to know of him now. Off to his blog.

Ed said...

Thanks Jay!

I'm sure whoever the next guy is will totally rock and not suck at all!

(feel that pressure)

TLF said...

Bhahaha... #2 is killing me... Bhahahaha!!!
Off to follow your blog..

Unknown said...

Hell, I'd do half those women.

Ed said...

Forgot to add Eva Mendes to my celeb list.

Told you it's constantly changing.

Kelly @ turned UP to ELEVEN! said...

OMG - If one more man says that Batman is not a hero I might lose my crap!


Batman rules, Superman is a close #2 and frankly Spiderman and JG can suck it!

P.S. JG you do realize that in one comic Batman knocks Supeman OUT COLD! Check it!

Moooooog35 said...

As a service to your readers, I asked Ed's wife what the name of his penis with and she said it's "Mr. Notgoodenuf."

Hutch said...

Wow, Batman really isn't a hit with the guys. He's plently manly for me though!

SharleneT said...

I'm for Superman. He has it all, and doesn't need anyone to fix his tie. Spiderman is limited to the urban environment. Trees are just too low for those deep sweeps; right? This guy is funny... Thanks for the introduction...

Come visit when you can and check out my new vlog!

Cathy said...

Did someone say Halle Berry? Yes, please.

Ed said...

Okay ladies, lets clear this superhero thing up once and for all.

Batman may be appealling to the ladies, as he is the tall, dark, and handsome, mysterious billionaire playboy.

HOWEVER, he is NOT a "Superhero"! As 'SUPER' implies the possession of special powers/abilities.

He may be a Hero & crime fighting caped-crusader, BUT HE IS NOT A SUPERHERO!

You're welcome.

ALSO, Mooooog is gay. His EX-wife told me so. Seems his height isn't the only thing that doesn't measure up.

Jenny DB said...

He DOES Have good taste.. Brunette LOVE! :-)
Seriously, no suggestions for V-Day besides Sex? That's hardly a gift..

Coffeypot said...

My super hero is EXLAX. It knocked the shit out of Superman, Batman and Spiderman.

But y’all need to start following Ed. He is a legend in comedy (in his own mind.)

BlackLOG said...

It's a bit pink in here....

Where have you brought me Ed?....

If this is some ladies boudoir I'm going to have a lot of explaining to do to Mrs B....

LisaDay said...

But Superman and his alterego look the same. It always annoyed me that no one could figure it out.


Anonymous said...

Hey look its Ed!

I agree, Superman is THE kick ass super hero.

Karen M. Peterson said...

You have some funny friends! :-)

I still say Batman is the best.

Momma Fargo said...

Great interview! Ed is funny, but don't tell him he is totally off the mark on superhero. Batman has a fast car, money, a cave, and it much, much hotter.

LiBBy said...

I am a super heroine and if you could see my thighs~ you'd understand. Shazam! Pow! Oof!