February 03, 2011

Man Week -- Jay

Last, but not least, we have Jay. Jay was my first male blog friend. {Obviously, he's super lucky.} He has seriously cracked me up since day one. He writes clever and witty posts, has mad graph skills and runs a weekly poll in his sidebar that always has me thinking long and hard before I vote. Yep, I just said long and hard. #TWSS

Disclaimer: Remember, these are men we're talking about, so there will be inappropriate language. It's just how they roll. You'll see my thoughts below in pink.

Name: Jay Ferris
Age: 31
Location: Seattle, WA
Superhero Name: Doctor Awesome
Blog: Genius Pending

1. Since your wife can't read your mind, what would you like for Valentine's Day other than sex?
Han Solo and Slave Leia costumes. Also, a bed shaped like the Millennium Falcon.

2. What's one simple thing you wish every woman understood?
Lefty loosey, righty tighty

3. All guys name their penis. Go ahead and tell us what you call yours.
Old Faithful

4. You're allowed to cheat with 5 celebs. Who are they?
Eliza Dushku, Anne Hathaway, Daniel Tosh, Layla Kayleigh, Kate Beckinsale
Brunettes for the win!

5. Describe yourself using only 3 words.
Prefers being different

6. Name one chick flick you actually enjoyed.
In May of 2009, I did a 30-day challenge that required me to watch and post a review of a new chick flick every day for a month. Even though the overall experience took about 10 good years off my life, one of the brighter spots was Return to Me starring David Duchovny and Minnie Driver. It's a sappy love story about two sexy people with really supportive friends and a penchant for doing the right thing. Basically nobody I could ever identify with.
I'd like to point out that he watched Twilight too. Even though he hated it, he gets major points for sitting through it.

7. Batman, Superman or Spider-Man? Why?
Spider-Man. Superman has the burden of living forever as well as feeling responsible for an entire planet. Batman is too crazy at times and prefers hanging out with little boys. Spider-Man is a genius, dork, smartass, marries a redhead, and never has to work out or get up from the couch to grab the remote.
Men and women really don't agree when it comes to superheroes. Spidey is my least favorite.

8. They're making a movie about your teen years. What's it called?
"Nobody's Watching"

9. You're on Death Row. What will you order for your last meal?
Chicken fried steak with country-style gravy, mac and cheese, baked beans, and a side of candied bacon. Dessert would consist of three pies; one cherry, one lemon meringue, and one chocolate cream. The goal here is to eat myself to death, thus saving taxpayer money in a final act of redemption.

10. Tell us a joke.
Here's one that is not only awful, but noteworthy because a guy told it to me within 10 minutes of meeting me at a bus stop.

Q: What's the difference between a crack whore and an onion?
A: I cry when I slice up an onion.

I guess people just feel like they can speak freely with me. Either that or they think I like to murder people.

I totally snorted at this. Does that make me a sicko?


Ed said...

Good stuff Jay.

Daniel Tosh?

I saw that and felt like I was playing that "One Of These Things Is Not Like The Others" Sesame Street game.

Hutch said...

Whenever I think of Spiderman I think of Tobey Maguire, thus killing any and all attraction I could have had to the superhero.

Clare and Gary said...

Jay are you sure you're not my husband.. ? the same women and in love with Daniel Tosh... freeky

Kelly @ turned UP to ELEVEN! said...

I love all these answers.

As far as the superhero thing goes Hotpants I think you're right we will all disagree depending on our sex. Most men I think like Spiderman because let's face it if the guy is into comics he's a bit of a nerd [I mean that as a compliment my boyfriend is a huge comic book nerd] but they see Spiderman as someone they could be. The young kid that gets it all in the end.. Super Powers a Hot Redheaded Wife and the whole kit n' kaboodle! I get it... but Batman still rules.

The onion comment made me snarf my water! AWESOME!

TLF said...

I'm loving his last meal, now I'm starving!!
And that joke, Oh Em Gee... bhaha!!

Macey said...

Did anyone else notice there was a guy thrown in there with the celebrities he'd do? Is it just me?
And, I totally know lefty loosey righty tighty FTW!

Salt said...

First of all, this is a very fun idea over here.
Second of all, I love your new blog design.

And seriously that first question could have easily been answered by my own husband.

Jay Ferris said...

Thanks again for letting me crash your blog -- I had a lot of fun answering these questions!

That being said, I'm pretty sure every woman on here answered the superhero question based off of which one they'd like to bed. In which case of course you're going to pick Batman; he's filthy fucking rich and the least likely of the three to accidentally kill you with their super strength during sex. In that Batman has none. Because he's basically just a well-funded mall cop.

PBJdreamer said...

Hello Dr Awesome

We have one thing in common

Daniel Tosh

Also? I am not a crack whore so no worries about getting sliced up.

Most Importantly!

I am a redhead that loves spidey

It's the shooting of the webs--

that is all

Impulsive Addict said...

Who is Daniel Tosh and why does HE want to cheat on his wife with him? I need to google.

He would give me brownie points for knowing righty tighty, lefty loosey.

I wish nobody was watching during my teenage years.

That joke is funny and oh so wrong!!!

Mrs. M said...

Love his creativity on the first question! And judging on his crushes he is clearly willing to switch teams once in a while...

Dezzy Lou Where Are You said...

I love Jay!

Anonymous said...

hahaha. Great pick. Loved Jay's answers. I'll definately head over and check him out.

SharleneT said...

No, no, no; it's Superman! Why don't the guys get it right? He's not going to do me harm and the flight privileges are incredible. Fresh air on hot summer nights; holding my cabana with its wine, music, grapes, bread, cheese, whilst flying to our own special hideaway (I know he can do it because I've seen him carry the American flag at the end of the movie.)... and he can clean house with just one blow... Batman is...well,... is...he's... naw, it's Superman all the way... But, otherwise, Jay seems like a very nice person with a great sense of humor... Going to pop over and check him out... Lefty loosey; rightey tighty.... right...

jennykate77 said...

I love Daniel Tosh...and that he added him to his list of 5. That's awesome.

Old Faithful. Interesting.

Why doesn't anyone pick Batman?! He's obviously the coolest. Obviously.

I love his final meal request.

Another great blogger interview!

Karen M. Peterson said...

Okay, that joke was really funny. In a completely sick and wrong way.

And what is it with men and Spider-Man? He's the dorkiest of the superheroes. I don't get it.

And Return to Me is definitely a great chick flick!

Mrs. Match said...

Hehe Daniel Tosh, love it. He is sort of sexually ambiguous. Ewe Anne Hathaway booooo. I giggled at that joke too. I wonder if the guy who told it was a murderer.